Beat the Guru: AFL Week 14
Adam Markowitz
Friday July 2, 2010
Once upon a time, I remember when I used to be able to handicap this crazy game... Another stellar 2-5 week for the Guru from lucky Week 13 is by far and away the worst week of picking I have ever had in the history of this kakamami league. I guess the Shock and Rush didn't get the memo that I was shooting at a perfect 0-fer week, huh?
However, the week wasn't completely unlucky for all involved. Fellow ArenaFan junkie, Andy Lopusnak, at 5-2,posted another solid week in spite of the fact that he has admitted to me that he has absolutely no clue what he's talking about regarding spreads in this league. Talons100 continues his march up our leader board for the season as well after matching Andy's 5-2 week.
I also have a mistake to correct from my previous article. In Week 12, I made mention that there was only one poster on the ArenaFan message boards that posted a week above .500. AFLover also finished 4-3 in his first week of entering in Week 12.
There's still plenty of time left in the season, so now is as good of a time as ever to join the rest of the crew on the ArenaFan boards and beat the Guru!
Disclaimer: This information should be used for entertainment purposes only. Should you choose to actually lay real money on these games, that’s purely your choice, and neither I nor ArenaFan are responsible. Lines courtesy of Bookmaker Sportsbook as of Friday morning.
Chicago Rush (+5) @ Tampa Bay Storm - That sigh of relief that you just heard was the collective noise of all of us Arena Football fans made voicing our pleasure that we don't have to watch Iowa and Dallas tonight on the NFL Network. Had a great conversation last weekend with someone in Tampa Bay. He noted my article on the Predators from the previous week and how my Preds came to play in a big way by destroying Jacksonville the next week. He wants me to rip the Storm a new one so they can come out of the blocks that fired up for their next game. No offense, my friend, but when your team has won six in a row and it is starting to look more and more like the road to the ArenaBowl is going through the St. Pete Times Forum in the American Conference, there isn't much to rip. Maybe there will be after this week, though...
Guru's Pick: Upset Special, Rush by 3
Guru's Pick: Barnstormers by 6
Milwaukee Iron (-20.5) @ Utah Blaze - So here's how bad Utah is. Milwaukee is coming to town having played incredibly mediocre football over the last month having lost three out of four games and is playing with zero inspiration right now. Hell, this bad run effectively started back on May 14th when the Blaze would've won in the Bradley Center if not for the worst display of coaching that I've ever seen in my entire life by the since-fired Ernesto Purnsley. Yet somehow, Utah has to catch 3 tuddies in this game because its average final score since that May 14th loss has been... brace yourself... -73-42. Ugh. Hey Utah, you're 2-9 ATS this year. You think you have another cover in you at some point?
Guru's Pick: Begrudgingly, Iron by "just" 13
Arizona Rattlers (+6) @ Spokane Shock - Now, here's a game that I finally have a legitimate opinion on. Give all the of the credit in the world to Arizona for going through this great run of games, winning six in a row and effectively locking up a playoff spot. However, Spokane has won seven straight and really does look like the best team in the league right now. The road trip to Jacksonville was a great one for the Rats, but asking them to stick around in back to back road games of that magnitude just isn't fair. The Shock are going to roll and, for all intents and purposes, will win the Western Division tonight.
Guru's Pick: Shocking Shock by 16
Alabama Vipers (+6.5) @ Jacksonville Sharks - Things could get a heck of a lot more interesting in the Southern Division if the Vipers can take out the Sharks on Saturday night. All of a sudden, Jacksonville doesn't look so swift after getting beaten down at home by the boys from the desert, but we think that this is a week for a rebound. Bama is going to be scoreboard watching at the same time, hoping that Orlando isn't beating Cleveland to try to keep a hold on that last playoff spot in the American Conference.
Guru's Pick: Shark Attack by 10
Cleveland Gladiators (+3.5) @ Orlando Predators - I feel honored that this is going to be the first time that I get to see John Dutton play quarterback live in a game. Our favorite INT machine was actually in great shape from Week 4 until last week, as he had only thrown two INTs in a stretch of seven games. Two last week against Iowa spoiled the good run. Oh, and Orlando, I have a bone to pick with you... Why do I have a bone to pick? Because it feels like you only play well the week after I pick bones. You'd better win this week, or the season could be effectively over. Too bad that Cleveland is thinking the same thing. All in all, this should be a great game.
Guru's Pick: Preds by just 3
Oklahoma City Yard Dawgz (-6) @ Bossier-Shreveport Battle Wings - Please allow me to speak in three letter acronyms for a second... OMG... WTF is up with this line? This game is going to make me LOL. That's right... You're seeing this one right. Sparky McEwen, all two lifetime road wins that he has to his credit in the AFL, is favored by a touchdown on away from home. That's how bad you are, Bossier. What makes you worse? You don't stand a chance to beat anyone else on your schedule until perhaps the Dallas game on the final day of the regular season.
Guru's Pick: Sparky's Dawgz by 10
Recap
Chicago +5
Iowa -2.5
Utah +20.5
Spokane -6
Jacksonville -6.5
Cleveland +3.5
Oklahoma City -6
Iowa -2.5
Utah +20.5
Spokane -6
Jacksonville -6.5
Cleveland +3.5
Oklahoma City -6
Beat the Guru's Top 10 (Must have 45 games selected to qualify)
|
YowDawg
|
33
|
23
|
58.93%
|
|
Talons100
|
40
|
33
|
54.79%
|
|
Thrash13
|
23
|
19
|
54.76%
|
|
fluence21
|
31
|
26
|
54.39%
|
|
AndyLopusnak
|
44
|
40
|
52.38%
|
|
strade32
|
24
|
24
|
50.00%
|
|
AFLGuru
|
40
|
44
|
47.62%
|
|
dthomas4233
|
32
|
37
|
46.38%
|
|
Rush43
|
19
|
23
|
45.24%
|
|
kryscio23
|
33
|
43
|
43.42%
|
See how well you can do against the Guru. Make your picks here. Winners will be recognized weekly.
Adam Markowitz is an accountant living in Orlando. Adam is an old school AFLer, having followed the AFL since 1991. He attended or covered well over 200 games, including 17 ArenaBowls. Adam worked for the Arena Football League for two years as a columnist and historian before retiring in 2017 when the 50-yard indoor war left the Sunshine State. Adam still muses about the AFL on ArenaFan from time to time, and you can follow him on Twitter @adammarkowitzea.
