Beat the Wrangler... err...Guru: Week 3
Adam Markowitz
Thursday March 13, 2008
So in honor of ESPN’s blunders, this will be the “Wranglers” edition of Beat the Guru!
We went 5-3 against the spread this week, but at least that dang Arena Guru didn’t beat me from over at AFO (also went 5-3). “Arena Guru” is a game in front of me, but there’s still a lot of season to go. You can check out his weekly article here.
Congratulations are in order to… NO ONE… Of you mere mortals out there, 18 have taken me on, and only one is in front of me, and nobody beat me this week. This game is tougher than y’all think, huh? Honorable mentions go out to InsideSix, TDTommy, and AFLJunkie for matching my AFL IQ this past week.
Disclaimer: This information should be used for entertainment purposes only. Should you choose to actually lay real money on these games, that’s purely your choice, and neither I nor ArenaFan are responsible. All lines are courtesy of Bookmaker.com as of Wednesday afternoon.
Chicago Wranglers (-6) @ Grand Rapids Wranglers: The Chicago Rush ran into a bit of a buzz saw this week when they took on the Philadelphia Soul in their second home game of the season. Meanwhile, the Grand Rapids Rampage opened up the season in fine form, as Adrian McPherson blew an early two stop lead against the defending champs in their home opener. Oh, for what it’s worth, the pre-game announcers for San Jose referred to Grand Rapids as the Chicago Rampage. Glorious. As long as MTL (McPherson the Loser) is playing instead of MTG (James MacPherson, AKA MacPherson the Greater), I’ve got no confidence in the Wrang… err… Rampage.
Guru’s Pick: Rush by 20
8-Ball’s Pick: Rampage
Utah Wranglers (+7) @ Orlando Wranglers: Who would’ve ever thunk it… the worst matchup of the week is between Danny White’s Utah Blaze and Jay Gruden’s Orlando Predators. Coach Gruden, after electing to go for two instead of kicking the PAT to put the game against the VooDoo into overtime: “I didn't want to leave it up to a rookie kicker [John Vaughn] to try and tie the game.” Thanks for cutting your veteran kicker then, Jay. It only took giving up 111 straight points before the Preds defense logged their first stop of the season, which is great news considering last year’s team gave up 65 points to this Blaze team in Amway Arena. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. No way am I picking Orlando a third time this season until they show me a pulse.
Guru’s Pick: Upset Special, Blaze by 3
8-Ball’s Pick: Blaze
Cleveland Wranglers (+1) @ Columbus Wranglers: Let’s take a second to tip our cap to Cleveland Gladiators head coach, Mike Wilpolt. He inherited arguably the worst team in the history of the AFL, and has led them to back-to-back victories to start their inaugural campaign. Ok, the schedule hasn’t been exactly difficult (hosting New York and Utah), but is playing in-state rivals, the Columbus Destroyers any more difficult? This is way too much respect for the defending conference champs.
Guru’s Pick: Sort of an upset special, Glads by 6
8-Ball’s Pick: Gladiators
Los Angeles Wranglers (-3) @ Georgia Wranglers: The difficult schedule for the Georgia Force continues this week as they host Sonny Cumbie and the Los Angeles Avengers. The Avengers have been impressive in two victories, but this is by far their most difficult game to date. It’s a short week for LA, having played on Monday night, and traveling across the country may be a bit much. Pair that with the fact that Georgia has yet to tick 50 points this season, and Troy Bergeron must be ready for an explosion. If the Force don’t get it done this week, back-to-back roadies on the horizon in Utah and Orlando could reasonably leave last year’s Southern Division champs at 0-5.
Guru’s Pick: Upset Special, Force by a dozen
8-Ball’s Pick: Avengers
Arizona Wranglers (+16.5) @ San Jose Wranglers: Perhaps the best moment of the week came well after midnight on the East Coast, when my good buddy Brett Bouchy appeared live on ESPN during the game between his Arizona Rattlers and the LA Avengers. With the Rattlers trailing by 17, Bouchy stated, “I think we’re gonna come back and win this game.” Jeff Smoker promptly turned the ball over on downs. Arizona came close in that one, only losing by 32 points. I hope your guarantee to the season ticket holders is better than THAT prediction, Brett. Still, should the SaberCats be laying this many points to anybody after barely escaping Grand Rapids with a win? I think not.
Guru’s Pick: SaberKitties by just 10
8-Ball’s Pick: Rattlers
New York Wranglers (+15) @ Philadelphia Wranglers: New York Dragons’ QB Rohan Davey notched his second victory in 12 tries against the Brigade in the ugliest game of Week 2. His other victory as a starter was against the Tampa Bay Storm, quarterbacked by John Kaleo, who was 36 years old at the game. Kaleo turned the ball over three times that game. Fitzgerald turned it over three times last week. The last time Philadelphia Soul QB Tony Graziani turned the ball over three times in a game was the first week of 2005, and the next time he turns it over will be the first time this season. Uh-oh Dragons…
Guru’s Pick: Soul by 21, the value of 3 turnovers
8-Ball’s Pick: Dragons
Tampa Bay Wranglers (-8) @ New Orleans Wranglers: Ok, I hear you VooDoo fans. Nice little win last week against my Preds. Unfortunately, the bonehead of the week award goes to DB Keon Raymond, for returning Shane Stafford’s 2nd INT of the 4th quarter for a TD with 0:36 remaining instead of just falling down. A couple chucks into the stands, and the ‘Doo walk away with a nice one point win. Instead, Stafford got the chance to redeem himself, and threw a TD to TT Toliver on the last play of the game, setting up the Preds for a chance at victory. The rest is history. As for the Tampa Bay Storm… Shh! Be very quiet… There’s a Storm brewing in the National Conference and objects in the rear view mirror for Dallas and Philadelphia are closer than they appear.
Guru’s Pick: Storm by 11
8-Ball’s Pick: Storm
Colorado Wranglers (+8) @ Dallas Wranglers: Apparently, Vegas still doesn’t believe in Chris Sanders as QB of the Dallas Desperados. Either that, or there’s way too much respect being given to the Colorado Crush’s slim victory over the Destroyers in Week 1. The over/under in this game is 91. Is that 91 points, or 91 references to John Elway? Either way, I’ll take the over… Oh, the game? Only 17 more steps to 19-0! I’ll just be happy if they call these teams the Crush and Desperados, and not Wranglers and Wranglers…
Guru’s Pick: Desperados by 23
8-Ball’s Pick: Desperados
As always, all new challengers are welcome (and all of you who’s spirits I haven’t already crushed are more than welcome to continue your feeble efforts at beating me every week). To review my picks (10-6 so far this year) with my lousy 8-Ball’s picks (5-11 so far this year)…
Guru’s Picks
Rush -6
Blaze +7
Gladiators +1
Force +3
Rattlers +16.5
Soul -15
Storm -8
Desperados -8
8-Ball’s Picks
Rampage +6
Blaze +7
Gladiators +1
Avengers -3
Rattlers +16.5
Dragons +15
Storm -8
Desperados -8
Beat the Guru’s Top 10
AFLJunkie: 11-5 (68.8%)
Brigadier General Stryker: 5-3 (62.5%)
TDTommy: 9-7 (56.3%)
Phillysoul04: 8-8 (50.0%)
Biff Nixon: 4-4 (50.0%)
Gladsfan4eva: 4-4 (50.0%)
Statjunkie: 4-4 (50.0%)
Kronuckle: 7-9 (43.8%)
Ekuvolley: 7-9 (43.8%)
InsideSix: 7-9 (43.8%)
Arena Guru: 11-5 (68.8%)
AFLGuru: 10-6 (62.5%)
8-Ball: 5-11 (31.3%)
Make Your Picks
See how well you can do against the Guru. Make your picks here. Winners will be recognized weekly.
Adam Markowitz is an accountant living in Orlando. Adam is an old school AFLer, having followed the AFL since 1991. He attended or covered well over 200 games, including 17 ArenaBowls. Adam worked for the Arena Football League for two years as a columnist and historian before retiring in 2017 when the 50-yard indoor war left the Sunshine State. Adam still muses about the AFL on ArenaFan from time to time, and you can follow him on Twitter @adammarkowitzea.
