Fathers First, Football Players Second
Kevin Sedelmeier
Monday June 13, 2005
As a father of a three-and-a-half year old, I know firsthand the type of love and joy a child can bring. Whether it’s when he walked in the room during Louisville’s Final Four loss to Illinois and told me, "Daddy, you’re a loud guy" or when he dances with dramatic emphasis to the Blue’s Clues theme, Lukas effortlessly gives me a happiness that is difficult to articulate. If I’ve had a long day at work, he is there smiling, waiting for me at home. Whether he realizes it or not, he personifies what’s truly important. But I am not the anomaly in thinking that about their children.
Fire quarterback Matt Sauk can be hard on himself after a sub par game, but he’s eased up a little over the last few years. "You have so many more things that are higher up in the priority list to come home to," said Sauk, who, along with wife Michele, are the proud parents of daughter Aysha.
Many Fire fans know Sauk as the fiery competitor behind center, the one who isn’t afraid to yell at his own receivers if they run incorrect routes. But off the field, Sauk is not so boisterous. He’s soft spoken and contemplative when he thinks of is daughter. "It used to take me three days to get over a bad game. As soon as I see her – she’s my life – so what’s more important, the picks or her?" Spoken with complete sincerity, Sauk is a great example of the hard-nosed athlete who gives it all during the game and between the lines, but understands the bigger picture off the field.
So does Fire fullback Demetrius Forney, father of Demyiah, 7, and infant Makayla. "I try to stay with the baby a lot, but I’m fortunate her mother (Monique Thomas) stays up with her, so I can get some sleep and proper rest," says Forney. "But other than that, it’s good. I love it. I wouldn’t change it for the world," he adds with his typically huge and inviting smile.
Forney the tough, load of a man that’s tenacious on both sides of the ball, is a teddy bear off the field. While Makayla is obviously too young to know what daddy does, Demyiah isn’t. "She understands what I do, and she loves daddy for it." In addition to being a star for the Fire and a father of two, Forney works for a local hotel and has his sites on "owning my own hotel or running it" when his football days are over. Whether the AFL will call before that happens is still a distinct possibility, but whatever happens, Forney will be there for his kids, playing the roll of the biggest teddy bear any kid ever owned.
On more than one occasion, Fire linemen Derrick Shepard has been seen after games carrying his eighteen-month old son Derrick Jr. around with him on the field. Like other players who now have a family, Shepard recognizes the shift in priorities. "In college, it was like trying to get to the pros, but now as I’ve gotten older and older, it’s for the love of the game and for the fans" and for Derrick Jr.
Shepard, who works in Dayton, Ohio, plays only home games for the Fire, and he is a fan favorite. "I love messing around with the fans," says Shepard with a grin. Another massive man with a big heart, Shepard, along with fiancé Shema Adams, is a proud parent, who no doubt shares his fun-loving nature with his little boy.
A few weeks ago, the Fire lost WR Tony Stallings to the CFL’s Calgary Stampeders, where he shined last week in the team’s first exhibition gaining 55 yards on 5 carries. Before he left, he spoke about his daughter Christian. "I’m trying to build a future for her. Hopefully, I can make some good money and get her ready for college,’ he said. "She inspires me. To look out and see her along with my wife (Levette), it’s things to play for. For family."
The day of her birth is one day the former University of Louisville star cannot soon forget for multiple reasons. "I got married when I was a senior. She actually was born on the day of the (NFL) draft, and I didn’t get drafted, so that was my draft. That was my blessing," said Stallings.
Blessing. That’s the appropriate word. The sound of your child’s laughter can’t be measured. It’s nourishment for a parent. More so than milk, it does a body good. So the next time fans want to jump all over a player who just dropped a pass, remember, they may be somebody’s dad, and their kids may be in the crowd, too.
And on this Father’s Day, if your father is still with us, don’t forget to call or see him. Maybe your dad is like mine and when asked "What would you like for Father’s Day" responds incredulously "I don’t need anything!"
And if your father is unfortunately no longer around, think of him, look at pictures, and know he is always a part of you. Sappy? A little. Maybe it reads like text written by a fired Hallmark card writer. But if a football player can act tender when talking about being a father, so can a lowly writer.
Kevin Sedelmeier is a native Louisvillian. A graduate of the University of Louisville with a B.A. in Communication and M.A. in English, he works as a technical writer and has written fifteen screenplays and numerous short
stories. He lives with his wife Elizabeth, son Lukas, and their dog Springsteen.