All together now Ė what the hell are they thinking?
This vote on the AFLís all-time greatest player for the first 20 years was enough to launch me out of retirement and my eternal snit over the fact that cheap bastard Kauffman still hasnít given me an ArenaFan golf shirt after all my dedicated years to our favorite niche sport.
Since Iím schlepping for an indoor league that doesnít play with nets and I pissed off somebody in the league PR office because I was quoted in a paper that God meant for arena football to be played in front of drunken crowds on Friday nights instead of Sundays in front of families, my induction into the Arena Football Hall of Fame is slightly less likelier than that of Peter Rose into Cooperstown. So Iím coming out firing on this baby.
Hey, I like Eddie Brown. Really. But him over Wags? Joe, am I allowed to use WTF, or have you gone red state like the rest of the bunch?
Wags has more rings than Eddie Brown. Was an IRONMAN. Dominated more games than Eddie Brown. Do you know how many times I had to find a variant of a Barry Wagner scores four or five touchdowns during the glory days?
Eddie Brown over Barry Wagner. Throw in Kurt Warner over Andy Kelly Ė uh, guys, Kelly won an ArenaBowl. Warner may have won the biggee in some other league, but not this one.
I demand a recount, and from a Floridian who still has to deal with the occasional 2000 election joke. Thatís saying something. Then again, itís what I tell my mother-in-law and all those other losers, oh Iím sorry, I meant Democrats. It never should have been close. If Al Gore had won his home state or did it right, it would never had come down to the mess we all endured.
Same situation here, this should have never been close.
This might be me, but maybe this is an indication that the AFL has lost touch with its past. Itís so much Bon Jovi and Elway and Ditka that the import of the Wagners and Kellys isnít as fully appreciated. Shame.
Dan Ryan has been involved with all forms of arena football since 1988, including writing for ArenaFan when Joe Kauffman and Tim Capper arenít killing his columns because they donít get his jokes or perspective. His day job is at Bethune-Cookman University, which has produced both an NFL Hall of Famer (Larry Little) and an Arena Football Hall of Famer (Stevie Thomas) and his hobby is tracking how many f-bombs Adam Markowitz drops in the chat room on game nights.